NB WOTM competition April 2021 mid month

 Mid month and we find a battle between Wren and SteveB.  Wren has the edge, but can he keep it?



AlkaXS 

Prince Philip posthumously crowned winner of MasterChef 2021

apepper 

Cameron raises the bar in “worst Prime-Minister” contest

BangingOnAgain 

Company’s ‘vision’ more inspirational than Martin Luther King’s

Man astonished to learn TV can’t hear him when he shouts at it

Bobski 

BBC bosses report catastrophic shortage of middle class actors

Chrisf 

Confirming postcode when sharing missing dog post ispointless, say experts

Grand National 2021: NewsBiscuit form guide

Dan.F 

Nicola Sturgeon found not guilty of Alex Salmond committing sexual assault

“We are going to have to learn to live with the Conservative Party,” says Whitty

Dominic_mcg 

Boris Johnson devastated after unfiltered photo of him appears online

Filthy Rich 

Carnage mars final furlong of reopening hairdressers’ steeplechase

Proclamation confirms ‘proportionate force’ deployed on Little Red Riding Hood

Gerontius 

Return of the comb-over ‘definitely a cause for concern’ says government

The southern tribes still mourning the death of Prince Philip

Gibbet 

Government to trial coughing in people’s faces

Granger 

Drunk discovers ‘truth’ about Heath Ledger & Ethan Hawke

harrypalmer 

Prince Philip funeral moved to avoid clash with Kilmarnock v Montrose cup tie

Max Stars 

New conventional cop series to launch

Myke 

Starmer backs Rachael Blackmore to win last week’s Grand National

Vatican is not institutionally Catholic, says commission

MzWibble 

Yosser Hughes insists he ‘complied with rules’ when lobbying government to gizza job

oshaughnessy 

Government celebrates Barnard Castle day with a 264-gun salute

Oxbridge 

Woman who worked out what’s going on in Line Of Duty to be burned as a witch

Paul L 

Band split with guitar playing dad because he’s their dad

SimoneCleal 

Man leaves baked brie in oven for 500th consecutive time

Sir Lupus

Queen sells up and moves to Ibiza.

StanleyMizaru 

Matt Hancock appreciation society says first meeting was a raging success

Lockdown sceptics take covid seriously as French philosophy is threatened

Telegraph reader feeling the pressure after call for global pandemic treaty

This Easter remember Piers Morgan suffered for you, Pope and Archbishop say

SteveB 

All parental threats now debunked by children

April fools’ day made illegal by government fearing they might look like fools

Bluetit forced to prove identity before being allowed to nest in bird box

Covid passport could be tattoo in the genital area

Scotch egg industry facing substantial collapse

Steve_l 

Loyalist rioters to stop burning petrol cars by 2025

Throngsman 

People can think about booking holidays, but don’t go any further says government

Wrenfoe 

Bitcoin electricity usage caused by leaving the ‘big light’ on

Cameron denies lobbying for Remain

Hampshire cedes to northern independence party

Keir Starmer completes tutorial mode

Nation mourns loss of TV scheduling

Nostalgia now a thing of the past

Number of TV cops to exceed real cops by 2022

We ask ‘decking – is it the new ‘patio’ for middle-class serial killers?’


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