WOTM Nov 2020 mid month


Doctor Chutney is on top form this month, with a clear lead but being chased by Wren and the Big O.  It's a short month, so anyone hoping to steal from the good doctor had better get writing.



antharrison 

Trump accidentally and repeatedly sues himself

Chipchas

Boris: “hands – knees & boomps-a-daisy is new UK slogan in battle against virus”

Chrisf 

Cummings’ cardboard box nailed on for best supporting actor award

DavidH 

Bank of England releases 150 billion sheets of loo paper

Prius completes left turn in under three hours

Which self-empowering resolutions will you ditch two days into lockdown?

Deceangli 

Trump to star in Home Alone 5

US election: results might be in before first Mars landing

Vaccine: Britain orders 1 trillion doses from dormant company in Liechtenstein

Deimos 

Biden frantically looking for expert to teach him “Twitter”

Doctor Chutney 

Doubts cast on action man’s military record: “not a model soldier”

Home Secretary raises gunpowder threat level

Plucky Brits just fail to beat US in WHO idiocy award

Dominic_mcg 

China still hasn’t created a disease that could be spread by 6G

Filthy Rich 

Panic-buying Olympics off the blocks in exactly the way you’ll be picturing

FloraJardine 

BBC: “US election results in maps and charts”

Gerontius 

UK arms industry ‘disappointed’ to find terrorists still using non-British made weapons

MADJEZ 

Police raid lockdown-breaking pensioner rave at the Cenotaph

Midfield Diamond 

US Presidential election referred to VAR

Milo Shame 

Corbyn cancels allotment pyramid plan

NickB 

Jingle bells urged to jingle only part of the way.

King Canute to sue the sea

oshaughnessy 

Furious Trump says prayers aren’t working and fires God

Michael Gove to present this year’s Tories in Need appeal

Tory ministers spread festive cheer by releasing Xmas hits album

Vaccine fiasco after Matt Hancock admits accidentallyordering 100m Tic Tacs

Sarah Tipper 

British Euphemism Council begins rehabilitating the word Trump

Sinnick 

Newspapers struggle with headline for US election result

Sir Lupus 

Southerners prefer ballet cos their football teams are shite, says Northern MP

StanleyMizaru 

Dido Harding launches NHS hide and seek system

Liberal Democrats are “hoping to learn from Trump’s tactics”

Trump outlines arguments for legal challenges to election result

SteveB 

Translations of Boris Johnson press briefings to follow several days later

Sydalg 

American serial killers getting too fat to do it properly

Throngsman 

Government finally admits it has ‘no idea’ why we have daylight saving time

National outpouring of grief as Cummings leaves

Walter Eagle 

Rishi admits, “there’s no business like no business.”

Wrenfoe 

Cummings quits before Xmas, just in time to become Satan’s little helper

Disappointment the outright winner of US election

Remainers ready to call for second US election

SAGE confirms that teachers are immune to covid – because of ‘tweed’

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