June 19 WOTM Final

Chippy did it again, pulling well clear of Titus.  Some great subs this month, keep it up.



A.Mantra 

Bear Grylls awarded OBE for services to voluntarily doing rank sh*t

apepper 


65 year old man confesses; ‘I wasn’t Kung Foo fighting’

 Mud shortage hits summer festivals

Benvoleo 

MP’s to stop voting as the people already voted in the referendum

Bravenewmalden 

D-Day ‘best day ever’, veteran recalls

 Bunbury 

 Johnson promises garden bridge for every city

Chipchase 

Boris: ‘I once did something selfless but I’m not proud of it’

Britain’s Moron Threat changed to ‘moderate’ following Trump’s departure

Documents discovered on train ‘not ours’ insists Farage


Good vet gets lamb back up on its feet

 Jo Brand is the one we are scared of? Really?




Chrisf 

‘Deep dive’ essentially a Google search, confirms manager

Middle class man has unconvincing dialogue with tradesman

DavidH

Love Island contestant expelled for not choosing Labour Party in couplings

Shaun Ryder enters Tory leadership race


 Deceangli 

 Audience ‘overjoyed’ to see PowerPoint starting up

Eddie_Modern 

Teetotal men ‘boring bastards’, research confirms

Gary Stanton 

‘Tank man’ now using Ocado

John Roughty 

Boris turns down BBC ‘Who Do You Think You Are?’

Jeremy Hunt admits to having been Health Secretary

 Police investigate Les Dawson’ s alleged hate crimes against Mothers-in-Law

Midfield Diamond 

Women footballers to receive cliché training
Newsbiscuit


Newsbiscuit Editorial Team 

Chuka deciding which party to betray next

Cocaine denies using Michael Gove


Pompeo: Corbyn is Elvis

nickb

Business planning to fuck Boris Johnson right back


Oxbridge 

I only invited Trump for shits and giggles, admits May

 Mad old cu*ts to choose between lying cu*t and slimy cu*t

ron cawleyoni 

13-0? I could have done better, boasts Trump

Sarah Tipper 

Couple buying Ottoman bed plan to put half the contents of their house in it


Shock as Blues Rock Covers-Band fails to play Cream’s ‘Crossroads’

Sir Lupus 

Zuckerberg launches “Faceblood” ‘purely to help haemophiliacs’

Soliwaxbern

Contract cleaners struggle to remove smell of abject failure from 10 Downing St

Godzilla criticises lack of roles for irradiated prehistoric sea monsters

Spoofle 

Corbyn: I took caviar but it was a mistake

Sugar Ray 

Raab promises return to ‘good old fashioned’ rape and pillage

Sydalg 

All household appliances to be petrol/ electric hybrid by 2025

Government to crack down on podcast pollution
Throngsman 

Germany demands reparations for towels lost on D Day





Titus 

Brexiteer with rotten tooth denies wanting ‘no-anesthetic’ extraction


Tonymc81 

Government to launch new reading initiative in schools

McVey followers on the run

Wrenfoe

Change UK split to pursue solo incompetence


YaBasta 

Ann Widdecombe the main cause of homosexuality

Boris denies ever coming off cocaine

Early version of poem Kubla Khan in ‘tweet’ form discovered

‘Trainspotting 3: The Young Conservatives’ announced

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