WOTM Nov 18 final

Well DavidH has made it this month.  He's been pipped at the post several times recently but has pushed himself to the top of the pile this time around.  YB and Wren have been pushing hard but are struggling to keep up.

As usual all the links to the successful subs below the leaderboard and tickers will be posted in the chat room.



Adrian Bamforth  

Alexa and Siri owners warned of threat from Halware

AndyP5919 

Planet Earth expresses relief at falling fertility rates

apepper 

Thanksgiving Turkey appointed to White House Press staff

Benvoleo 

People “taking back” laws to protect democracy now angry when we uphold them

People “taking back” laws to protect democracy now angry when we uphold them

Chipchase 

American authorities baffled by groups of citizens dying unexpectedly

Shock as Dido announces 2019 world tour without Aeneas

Spinal Tap ‘never went up to eleven’, claims manager

Thanksgiving turkey takes own life following Trump pardon

Trump aides caution against crowd surfing during midterm rallies

UK Gold fined for showing programme that wasn’t Only Fools and Horses

Wombles slam new zero hours contracts

Chrisf  
Chair of 1922 Committee is ‘the only person that knows Colonel’s secret recipe’

Channel 4 executives begin training in asking for scraps with fish and chips

Man seeks counselling after failing to find valid Pizza Express discount voucher

Paul Pogba sets off on next penalty run up

Cinquecento 

Doctor Who faces no confidence vote

Crayon 

Homeless war heroes advised to stay indoors on firework nights

DavidH 

8000 bone-china Rees-Moggs revealed by fracking quake

Agreement reached on next batch of paper to go in Commons recycling bin

Bank of England to issue self-shredding notes to combat Brexit devaluation

Brexit pantomime to be finalised by mid-November in time for Tory nativity play

Cabinet endure all-night sofa negotiations as DFS Christmas deadline looms

‘Home Bargains Guard’ remain on standby for no-deal Brexit

Iceland ditch ‘too political’ Christmas ad for dubbed Lib Dem broadcast

PM has a patio malfunction at number 10

SAS soldiers to experience the raw horror of female beauty regimes

Dick Everyman 

EU grants future protection to island of isolated tribes

Dominic_mcg 

Apple apologizes after latest software update makes Siri an emo.

The Third Foot and Mouth regiment to patrol Irish border

Editor 

Brexit becomes sentient, now destroying Islington

Farmer Giles 

Lonely Big Brother contestant Theresa opens her heart in Diary Room

Gary Stanton  

Remain voter about to have life-threatening surgery not allowed a second opinion

Gerontius 

Yemen war victims condemn Corbyn coat

Harrypalmer 

Country urges David Cameron to take up golf

Ian Searle 

The In-Brexit-weeners to reunite for one-off anniversary show

ianslat 

May admits basing strategy on game shows

Jonny Shlep 

Post-Brexit Bond Films to Be Much Longer Due to 007 Passport Control Delays

Trump saved female intern from Acosta sex attack claims Sarah Sanders

Macattack1964 

Football Club Owners Fit & Proper Test New Clause: Must Be A Proper Bastard

Mark Gregory 

Ryanair staff sacked for sleeping on floor: Passengers should have got priority

Midfield Diamond  

Dutchman launches lawsuit to avoid lying about his age to get a shag

Mother 

“Someone has to stay and wave their willy”, says Gove

Theresa May and the Holy Deal – Scene 2 – Storming the European Commission

nickb 

Farting contest ‘ruined’ by man who threw dart

World cries out for the tragic assassination of Donald Trump

Oxbridge 

Cancer wins brave battle with Bromsgrove man

Throngsman

Brexit deal ‘makes EU write rules for our benefit’ says May

Just the small issue of total disagreement in the way of Brexit, says May

Titus

Man Who Preferred Apples To Oranges Berated On The Internet

Wrenfoe 

Boris Johnson sold for scrap

Kilogram to be measured in Greggs’ Pasties

Maybe Brexit deal good if Trump thinks its bad, says confused Britain

Oh…Trump still here?

Scientists confirm clown pubes ‘match’ their hair

Stan Lee to be brought back for Stan Lee II

Tommy Robinson less of an ‘advisor’, more of a ‘cautionary tale’

USA also says something mean about Iran’s mother

Your Mum & Dad definitely have plans for your room

YaBasta  

Austria and Switzerland warn of dangers of hard border

Cavemen found Bronze Age ‘hard to adjust to’

Film of reporter’s altercation with Trump aide “actually a clip from The Matrix”

Foreign Office advises travellers to dangerous areas to have a pretty wife

Indian independence campaign “had no plan for Pakistan border” say critics

Man reads article on Victoria’s Secret models for not entirely feminist reasons

Public request more articles saying environmental problems not their fault

Purchaser of Hockney for record price “probably not a fellow Yorkshireman”

Tudors ‘demanded second vote on the Reformation’

Unemployed people confirm they’re also “bored shitless”

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