Sept WOTM 2018 Final
Another month, another ding-dong battle. Apart from the 95 tickers posted this month there have been a lot of contenders for the lead that isn't done justice from the table below. First off, Myke has proven that his win last month wasn't an accident. He's been in the lead all month and should feel justifiably proud of his output this month, including the gags he was asked to explain. Unfortunately for Myke, he now fall foul to the Wren rule that says you can't win the title two months on the bounce.
What the table doesn't show is that until a few days ago it wasn't certain who would take the title. Wren, Chip and Titus were all in strong contention. In the end Wren had a final push and regains the coveted virtual mug on his avatar for the month of October - well done Wren, commiseration to Chip and Titus.
As usual all the hyperlinks to the Front Page, News in Brief and Left Alert are listed below. All the tickers are in the Chat room entry.
A.L.Shaw
‘Oh good! Back to work, school and Brexit’, says Britain
AndyP5919
NHS jealous of North Korea
Novichok thrilled with ‘nerve agent of the year’ award
Benvoleo
Unspecified DNA in 20% of meat ‘vile’ complain consumers, between mouthfuls
Chipchase
Bob Dylan charged with historic crimes against music
Boris: ‘When I’m in No.10 I’ll have Trump resolve Irish border question’
HBO announces new cop show ‘The Brexit Beat’
Jamie Oliver targets prison inmates as a captive audience
Chrisf
Bodyguard-obsessed work colleague insists on calling office gossip ‘Kompromat’
Reboot of Thomas theTank Engine hit by infrastructure delays
CulchaVulcha
Labour finally agrees to disputed gefilte fish recipe
Daily Moose
Brexit leaver voters to be relocated to non EU country
DavidH
Brexit space programme to include massive telescope made from used contact lenses
Final series of Big Brother decoded from alien galaxy signals
Post-Brexit Ryder Cup to be three-way ‘winner stays on’ tournament
Sting freed from six-way sexual entanglement with nest of squirrels
Tesco replace plastic bags with ‘Kangaroos-for-life’
Vince Cable considering reconsidering considering resigning
Deceangli
Brewers confirm that there is ‘no safe level’ of epidemiological research
Dismay as OED downgrades swears
Jacob Rees-Mogg to be next Dr Who villain
Meghan to train as Close Protection Officer
Nero: Rome fire not as bad as news reports claimed – Fact
Tory leadership contest to be settled by Latin epigrams
‘You Are Here’ signs may breach GDPR
DGreen
Unused condom frustrated after five years in wallet
Dominic_mcg
We’ll replace the Red Arrows with murmurations of starlings, says Corbyn
Gary Stanton
Joy and some bemusement as Salmond somehow manages to get crowdfunded
Gerontius
Evans leaves Radio 2 with 100% record of making everything about himself
harrypalmer
Gym advertises for fat bloke to talk bollocks in the sauna
Skripal suspects leave scathing Salisbury Cathedral TripAdvisor review
JBP
lluminati admit mistake over Coleen Nolan and Loose Women
Macattack1964
Nursery Rhymes placed in special measures after damning Ofsted Inspection
Plastic bags now fourth most shoplifted item
Milo Shame
Labour to back Quantum Leap not People’s Vote
Myke
Daily Mail fury as foreign weather invades Britain
Intern Required! NewsBiscuit is recruiting
Men’s brains unable to recognise shades of colour like beige or elephant’s breath, say scientists
Odeon introduce slurping, rustling and chatting in Dolby surround sound
Top Ten Tube chat-ups
MzWibble
Barnier publishes a book on the political philosophy of Brexit – in French, bien sur
Boris Johnson’s career now over. Again.
Boris Johnson in shock no-shock stunt
EU secretly decides not to build an Irish border.
Hungary punished by EU – put on naughty Steppe
Newbiscuit Editorial Team
Jacob Rees Mogg’s children confronted by ‘anarchist nut-job’ almost daily
‘Real people answering phones is the future’ claims communications company
‘World’s oldest cheese’ found in BBC scheduling
nickb
Andrea Leadsom’s search for new bodyguard ‘terrifies’ UK security industry
Boris ‘wearing suicide pants’
Silent Boris Johnson’s bottom shows he is ‘getting ready to pounce’
Oxbridge
C4 launch ‘Naked Political Attraction’
Paul L
C of E hopes “Congregation Clothing” will halt decline in church attendance
seso
Cars 4 To Include First Gay Scene
Sinnick
Full transcript of Russia Today’s Editor-in-Chief interviewing alleged Skripal attackers
Sydalg
Government to build wind factories to power wind farms
Man who faked death to cancel gym membership to be sentenced today
Throngsman
City to hold street parties to celebrate tenth anniversary of Credit Crunch
Dismay as Larry the cat rejects Chequers Plan
Russia claims Thomas Cook responsible for Skripal poisoning
Study links Coronary Disease to reading tabloids, says Daily Mail
Titus
Britain’s Oldest Woman still alive
Draft Second Referendum Ballot Format
Tony Blair in bid to become new leader of Lib Dems
Wrenfoe
Fear that ‘Operation Yellowhammer’ intends to bring back Timmy Mallet
Joseph & Mary disappointed by baby gender test
Michael Foot spotted in Salisbury
Most Brexit ideas contaminated by Johnson residues
Strawberry found in sewing kit
Theresa May wakes to discover Brexit ‘was all a dream’
Tom Watson ‘reversed’ type-2 socialism
Tory Party combines with Clown Conference
‘Weight Watchers’ sinister rebrand – Just ‘Watchers’
You can be a pervert, just don’t try becoming a Judge or a President
YaBasta
Brexit plan to be based on red, white and blue minis
German army at Stalingrad “just tourists”, historian claims
Public votes “Brexy McBrexface” most popular Brexit plan
Roy Hodgson’s beliefe in Benteke declared ‘a weligion’
What the table doesn't show is that until a few days ago it wasn't certain who would take the title. Wren, Chip and Titus were all in strong contention. In the end Wren had a final push and regains the coveted virtual mug on his avatar for the month of October - well done Wren, commiseration to Chip and Titus.
As usual all the hyperlinks to the Front Page, News in Brief and Left Alert are listed below. All the tickers are in the Chat room entry.
A.L.Shaw
‘Oh good! Back to work, school and Brexit’, says Britain
AndyP5919
NHS jealous of North Korea
Novichok thrilled with ‘nerve agent of the year’ award
Benvoleo
Unspecified DNA in 20% of meat ‘vile’ complain consumers, between mouthfuls
Chipchase
Bob Dylan charged with historic crimes against music
Boris: ‘When I’m in No.10 I’ll have Trump resolve Irish border question’
Jamie Oliver targets prison inmates as a captive audience
Chrisf
Bodyguard-obsessed work colleague insists on calling office gossip ‘Kompromat’
Reboot of Thomas theTank Engine hit by infrastructure delays
CulchaVulcha
Labour finally agrees to disputed gefilte fish recipe
Daily Moose
Brexit leaver voters to be relocated to non EU country
DavidH
Brexit space programme to include massive telescope made from used contact lenses
Final series of Big Brother decoded from alien galaxy signals
Post-Brexit Ryder Cup to be three-way ‘winner stays on’ tournament
Sting freed from six-way sexual entanglement with nest of squirrels
Tesco replace plastic bags with ‘Kangaroos-for-life’
Vince Cable considering reconsidering considering resigning
Deceangli
Brewers confirm that there is ‘no safe level’ of epidemiological research
Dismay as OED downgrades swears
Jacob Rees-Mogg to be next Dr Who villain
Meghan to train as Close Protection Officer
Nero: Rome fire not as bad as news reports claimed – Fact
Tory leadership contest to be settled by Latin epigrams
‘You Are Here’ signs may breach GDPR
DGreen
Unused condom frustrated after five years in wallet
Dominic_mcg
We’ll replace the Red Arrows with murmurations of starlings, says Corbyn
Gary Stanton
Joy and some bemusement as Salmond somehow manages to get crowdfunded
Gerontius
Evans leaves Radio 2 with 100% record of making everything about himself
harrypalmer
Gym advertises for fat bloke to talk bollocks in the sauna
Skripal suspects leave scathing Salisbury Cathedral TripAdvisor review
JBP
lluminati admit mistake over Coleen Nolan and Loose Women
Macattack1964
Nursery Rhymes placed in special measures after damning Ofsted Inspection
Plastic bags now fourth most shoplifted item
Milo Shame
Labour to back Quantum Leap not People’s Vote
Myke
Daily Mail fury as foreign weather invades Britain
Intern Required! NewsBiscuit is recruiting
Men’s brains unable to recognise shades of colour like beige or elephant’s breath, say scientists
Odeon introduce slurping, rustling and chatting in Dolby surround sound
Top Ten Tube chat-ups
MzWibble
Barnier publishes a book on the political philosophy of Brexit – in French, bien sur
Boris Johnson’s career now over. Again.
Boris Johnson in shock no-shock stunt
EU secretly decides not to build an Irish border.
Hungary punished by EU – put on naughty Steppe
Newbiscuit Editorial Team
Jacob Rees Mogg’s children confronted by ‘anarchist nut-job’ almost daily
‘Real people answering phones is the future’ claims communications company
‘World’s oldest cheese’ found in BBC scheduling
nickb
Andrea Leadsom’s search for new bodyguard ‘terrifies’ UK security industry
Boris ‘wearing suicide pants’
Silent Boris Johnson’s bottom shows he is ‘getting ready to pounce’
Oxbridge
C4 launch ‘Naked Political Attraction’
Paul L
C of E hopes “Congregation Clothing” will halt decline in church attendance
seso
Cars 4 To Include First Gay Scene
Sinnick
Full transcript of Russia Today’s Editor-in-Chief interviewing alleged Skripal attackers
Sydalg
Government to build wind factories to power wind farms
Man who faked death to cancel gym membership to be sentenced today
Throngsman
City to hold street parties to celebrate tenth anniversary of Credit Crunch
Dismay as Larry the cat rejects Chequers Plan
Russia claims Thomas Cook responsible for Skripal poisoning
Study links Coronary Disease to reading tabloids, says Daily Mail
Titus
Britain’s Oldest Woman still alive
Draft Second Referendum Ballot Format
Tony Blair in bid to become new leader of Lib Dems
Wrenfoe
Fear that ‘Operation Yellowhammer’ intends to bring back Timmy Mallet
Joseph & Mary disappointed by baby gender test
Michael Foot spotted in Salisbury
Most Brexit ideas contaminated by Johnson residues
Strawberry found in sewing kit
Theresa May wakes to discover Brexit ‘was all a dream’
Tom Watson ‘reversed’ type-2 socialism
Tory Party combines with Clown Conference
‘Weight Watchers’ sinister rebrand – Just ‘Watchers’
You can be a pervert, just don’t try becoming a Judge or a President
YaBasta
Brexit plan to be based on red, white and blue minis
German army at Stalingrad “just tourists”, historian claims
Public votes “Brexy McBrexface” most popular Brexit plan
Roy Hodgson’s beliefe in Benteke declared ‘a weligion’
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