WOTM April 2018 - final week

Final week and Dom has proven his comedic chops once more, hitting all the elements from Front Page, News in Brief, Left alert and twenty tickers. Syd scored thirty points to come a creditable second place and third goes to DavidH who had a tremendous first half of the month.

As usual hyperlinks are posted below the leaderboard for all the FP, NiB and LA entries, while the blog has the full list of tickers.



Adrian Bamforth

Abba agree to rid charts of non-Swedish pop music

Al OPecia

Achieve inner peace by practicing ‘Bloody-Mindedness’

A.L.Shaw

DVLA to unveil ‘sunlit uplands’ Brexit signage

 UK Government unveils new ‘British Nuclear Winter Time’

apepper

 Bastard shortage hits Home Office recruitment

 BMWs to come with disabled parking sticker pre-installed

Jim Davidson offers to take on role of Apu

 Bravenewmalden


'Action’ to be introduced in bid to make cricket interesting

 Man still waiting to be blessed nine minutes after sneeze

 Security announcements ‘instigated by Bose’ claim

 Chipchase


Companies to be forced to remove ‘solutions’ from van liveries and letterheads

 Disabled man cock-a-hoop at being told he is now fit for work


Man who didn’t ‘like’ cat video on social media forced into hiding

 RMT dispute halts filming of Spielberg’s Casey Jones remake

 Chrisf


I was coming out of the junction anyway, confirms Audi driver

 Mine is more bigger than a state visit, confirms Trump

 ‘One who smelt it dealt it’ conviction unsafe confirms Judge

 Trampolines resume non-bouncing duties

Cinquecento

‘Ambo’ Rudd launches personal campaign of violence


Daneade


Confused, elderly Frenchman facing deportation from North London
Government to Erect Statue of Burglar

 KGB Wants its Money back on Novochok





DavidH

Barbra Streisand supported by Barbra Streisand wows on opening night

 Barristers to strike for non-uniform day

 Review of Eddie Izzard’s ‘Parliamental’

Tate and Lyle rescue school kids from the cane

 Deceangli

Depressed Eric Bristow fans turn to pies for consolation


Scientists finally agree how long a piece of string is

 Dick Everyman

Hard shoulder rubbish to be classed as street art

Dominic_mcg

10 things no-one tells you about running a marathon






 Sir Lupus

 TV licence waived for street parties watching marriage of Sainsbury and Asda

 Squudge 

 Winchester resident lays claim to mining rights in local pothole

StanleyMizaru

Isle of Wight man devastated as number of Facebook friends plummets

Sydalg





Tarsem 


Terry Bunn




Thatwasbeast







Wrenfoe 






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