August WOTM week 1 & 2
Apologies for the lateness of the first report for the month of August, but I've had a bit of a break away. Now back in the driving seat of the unofficial writer of the month competition it looks like we have three writers at the top - Daneade, Jonny Shlep and Wrenfoe, but of course the house rule is that as Wren currently carries the virtual mug around he can't win August. It might ound rough, but it was suggested by the mighty Wren himself.
Just on their tails are Dominic_mcg and Oxy, both a point behind the leaders. As usual, without taking anything away from Oxy, I'm immensely impressed when pure ticker writers like Mr MCG battle their way up the leader board.
There's a couple of us, Al Opecia and myself, only two points be3hind the leaders, so it's clear there's everything to write for in this month's competition.
Adrian Bamforth
All service station food to be edible by 2040
Apepper
Rioters to phase out petrol bombs by 2040
Bravenewmalden
‘Overcrowded prisons’ shortlisted for Annual News Story of the Year award
Painting bought for £1.50 at car boot sale turns out to be ‘worthless’
Chrisf
Achilles’ weaknesses actually trashy TV and Lloyd-Webber musicals, files reveal
Daneade
Conor McGregor to negotiate Brexit
Disaster for British pervs as sex robots become self-aware
Daneade and Apepper
Prince Philip to become professional troll
Dick Everyone
Out now! ‘The Expert’s Guide to Whitewashing’ by Sarah Huckabee Sanders
Jeffrey
New series of CSI Isle of Wight starts tonight
Jonny Shlep
Outcry at Arsenal plans to stage dog fights during half-time interval
Neymar: Finally, I feel secure enough financially to sign up to Amazon Prime
Portuguese TV company shelve plans for A Place In The Pissing Rain series
Lloydie
Vomiting bug hits a number of armchair athletes at the World Championships
Marie Maurer
Office worker’s weekend was “quite quiet, actually”
Milo Shame
Careers Officer to be awarded the Victoria Cross
NaffLaff
Panini stickers looking to strike UK trading deal
Nice Admin Lady & Milk Marketing Board
Mum accidentally exposes a massive tit working at the V&A Museum
Oxbridge
Man accepts own mortality after standing next to his son at urinal
Smart Alex
US chlorine-washed chicken least of our worries, admit Brits
Throngsman
Emotions run high as duct tape repair enters seventh year
Mary Berry held on counter terrorism charge
Prince of Wales revealed as ‘Banksy’
Titus
Football Club Considers Breeding Genetically Modified Players Instead Of Buying Them
Underconstruction
Hopes fade for caravanning family down to last board game
Wrenfoe
National Trust celebrates ‘Heterosexual Shame Weekend’
North Korea asks – Do you feel lucky? Well? Do ya, punk?
Student describes Pesto as ‘transformative’
YaBasta
Scientists discover new particle, the Scaramuccion
Trump explains he is “hipster president” with “pop-up senior staff”
Just on their tails are Dominic_mcg and Oxy, both a point behind the leaders. As usual, without taking anything away from Oxy, I'm immensely impressed when pure ticker writers like Mr MCG battle their way up the leader board.
There's a couple of us, Al Opecia and myself, only two points be3hind the leaders, so it's clear there's everything to write for in this month's competition.
Adrian Bamforth
All service station food to be edible by 2040
Apepper
Rioters to phase out petrol bombs by 2040
Bravenewmalden
‘Overcrowded prisons’ shortlisted for Annual News Story of the Year award
Painting bought for £1.50 at car boot sale turns out to be ‘worthless’
Chrisf
Achilles’ weaknesses actually trashy TV and Lloyd-Webber musicals, files reveal
Daneade
Conor McGregor to negotiate Brexit
Disaster for British pervs as sex robots become self-aware
Daneade and Apepper
Prince Philip to become professional troll
Dick Everyone
Out now! ‘The Expert’s Guide to Whitewashing’ by Sarah Huckabee Sanders
Jeffrey
New series of CSI Isle of Wight starts tonight
Jonny Shlep
Outcry at Arsenal plans to stage dog fights during half-time interval
Neymar: Finally, I feel secure enough financially to sign up to Amazon Prime
Portuguese TV company shelve plans for A Place In The Pissing Rain series
Lloydie
Vomiting bug hits a number of armchair athletes at the World Championships
Marie Maurer
Office worker’s weekend was “quite quiet, actually”
Milo Shame
Careers Officer to be awarded the Victoria Cross
NaffLaff
Panini stickers looking to strike UK trading deal
Nice Admin Lady & Milk Marketing Board
Mum accidentally exposes a massive tit working at the V&A Museum
Oxbridge
Man accepts own mortality after standing next to his son at urinal
Smart Alex
US chlorine-washed chicken least of our worries, admit Brits
Throngsman
Emotions run high as duct tape repair enters seventh year
Mary Berry held on counter terrorism charge
Prince of Wales revealed as ‘Banksy’
Titus
Football Club Considers Breeding Genetically Modified Players Instead Of Buying Them
Underconstruction
Hopes fade for caravanning family down to last board game
Wrenfoe
National Trust celebrates ‘Heterosexual Shame Weekend’
North Korea asks – Do you feel lucky? Well? Do ya, punk?
Student describes Pesto as ‘transformative’
YaBasta
Scientists discover new particle, the Scaramuccion
Trump explains he is “hipster president” with “pop-up senior staff”
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