April WOTM Final Week

And the winner is...

OK, let's see how the week panned out. At the end of week three YaBasta and yours truly were neck and neck.  Then YB subbed a brilliant piece about the science march to be peer reviewed.  Job done, game over, in the lead by one point and that's all it takes.

Then the front page was owned by Oxy, harrypalmer and S-Bahn in turn, none challenging the lead, but all turning in fine subs. Then Thursday I found a sub I'd dashed off the night before, more to wind Titus up after I'd had an idea for a ticker that grew into a full blown piece of one thousand year old fake news hit the front page.  Back in the lead. Add that to a slow fake news week and I seem to have ended up at the top of the list, not by much, but it looks like I get the chance to balance the virtual mug on my avatar for the whole of May, unless, of course, KPMG are in charge of issuing the virtual mugs, then it's anyone's guess who will end up with it.

Anyway, fix or no fix, here's the final results for April.

Now, the updated list of FPs and NiBs for this month, by author and title, both in alphabetical order.  Apologies if I've missed any or if links don't work.

Adrian Bamforth

‘Grandpa’ Joe Bucket has Incapacity Benefit revoked Jesus promises two new pancake days AnnaComedy Hunger Games to replace TV leaders debate AReader Metaphor Times April 27, 2017 Bobby Bigot

Dutch kids to be exposed to danger to teach them about life; scientists disagree Chrisf

Chesney Hawkes the ‘ideal’ job candidate Man effortlessly leaves Facebook

Sky wins Easter Week TV contract The Grand National(ism): Runner, Riders and Dog Meat Today’s recipe from Kitchen Nightmares: Gordon Ramsey’s Steaming Hacked Beef Unilateral test of seat recliner fuels tensions in mid-cabin area Cinquecento Sean Spicer goes for double or quits DavidH New U2 album to be released in flu-jab Tarantino public information film has body count of 150+ Deceangli Blu-Tack to replace gravity in poor areas OFSTED to take over shipping forecast Welsh seize right to decide on bin collection days Dick Everyman Trump, Putin, Assad, and Kim Jong-un to stage international ‘Fuckayou’ contest Gerontious TV cop eats dinner before being called out to murder scene GrahamB Varsity Boat Race disrupted by Pirates harrypalmer Bananarama to stand against Theresa May in Maidenhead ‘brief’ Mash remake to be made on ship off Korea Empty chair rules out taking part in TV election debates Great Repeal Bill hugely complex says lawyer lighting cigar with a £50 note Gutted voters denied chance to tell Farage where to shove it Nineties indie band Mugwump reunite to cash in on publicity School kids tell Corbyn that story about him becoming PM is too far-fetched Iroquois Pliskin Howard invades Spain Ironduke Corbyn pledges to abolish February Ivan Edwards Man has shock plans to enjoy Easter without getting angry jonessgl Facebook user has better life than all her friends, LOL Naff Laff Hipster on Hipster violence threatens Brighton Beach Man believed to have broken the Internet goes into hiding Theresa ‘not sulking’ about non-invite to Donald’s party Newsbiscuit Editorial Team Nation to choose colour of handcart we’re all going to hell in Oxbridge Hipster opposed terrorism before it was fashionable to Nuclear holocaust curtailing football season ‘would be Spursiest thing ever’ Ronseal Croydon gang is ‘not Brexit’ enough S-Bahn Adverts pulled after cosmetics found to have been modelled on pig heads Woman becomes human chair Skylarking Daventry man making £1,445 a day despite still living in Daventry StanleyMizaru Cadbury snub Sky Rabbit Thatwasbeast Things ‘literally’ experienced by colleague mainly figurative or exaggeration  ‘Please…smash…me’ mouths Ronaldo statue. Throngsman Arkansas offering cakes to fill empty seats at execution baby birth weight – who gives a crap? De-metrication to take 10, sorry – 12, years Ethelred was ‘actually ready’, new report finds EU thanks Farage for his ‘contribution’ Government to offer GCSE in understanding new GCSE grades Kim Jong-un ‘on the verge of another haircut’ Preparations for Armageddon on hold as world awaits British election result Supreme Court rules against teacher’s term-time holiday Lloyd’s downsizes customers  Well-deserved ‘Investors in People’ award for company whose employees can all maintain the photocopier Titus UKIP proposes merger with Labour Underconstruction Colouring in skills slipping as parents ignore term-time holiday rules Husband may trigger process of redecorating spare room in 2019 Marathon finisher accidentally cooked at Gas Mark 6 for two hours Ultra-competitive father hides Easter Eggs seven miles from family home Wenger to become his own statue Wrenfoe Birthday boy just happy to ‘hit stuff’ Labour offers M&S delivery Mother of all bombs ‘disappointed’ in IS Own brand Cola not sh$t enough Sadly Tennis ‘still a thing’ Tories propose four new Banker’s Holidays Trump still has an erection YaBasta Automation threatens future of newspaper columnists Can you spare £3 a month to save The Guardian? EU negotiating strategy to be based on Monty Python and the Holy Grail Gerald Ratner to take over at United Airlines Kendall Jenner could have prevented Holocaust with a Pepsi, historians say Melania Trump ‘also lied about her age’ Millions ask to be included in Mel B’s restraining order ‘Remainerland’ novel imagines a world where Remain won Science march to be peer reviewed Scotland posts profile on SugarDaddies.com United offers new class of tickets for, you know, them…