Unofficial Newsbiscuit Writer of the Month Competition

Congrats to Wren for taking the virtual crown this month, commiserations to Chippy for a gallant flank attack on Wren's position .  Links to all the subs below the leaderboard and tickers, as always, in the chat room. A.Mantra  Government’s Withdrawal Agreement shortlisted for Turner prize Man alone at the cinema, now wishing he’d not worn a trench-coat Acidcirus  Brexit writers blamed for poor end to Theresa May arc Adrian Bamforth  Biscuit heiress’ comments ‘not Nice’ ISIS release latest Game of Prophets episode apepper  Doctors run out of body parts to describe Tory leadership candidates ‘End of coal linked to blindness’ claim snowmen ‘Gove accuses Gove of treachery for trying to overturn 2016 leadership election Bravenewmalden  ‘arst’ or it could be ‘ersb’ tagger strikes again Dulux marketing team ‘still giggling’ over One Coat product name Local elections signal return to ‘not giving a shit’ for Brexit voters Chip...

Wren's back on form, leading the pack.  He's not unassailable, but it'll take some subbing to overtake him.  Consider gauntlet thrown down. A.Mantra  Government’s Withdrawal Agreement shortlisted for Turner prize Man alone at the cinema, now wishing he’d not worn a trench-coat Adrian Bamforth  ISIS release latest Game of Prophets episode apepper  ‘End of coal linked to blindness’ claim snowmen Bravenewmalden  ‘arst’ or it could be ‘ersb’ tagger strikes again Dulux marketing team ‘still giggling’ over One Coat product name Local elections signal return to ‘not giving a shit’ for Brexit voters Chipchase  ANALYSIS – 3 year-old Ollie on Gavin Williamson’s fall from grace EastEnders chase ratings with a plot that’s out of this world Mears and Grylls serve no purpose whatsoever, says study Chrisf  Colleague definitely going to use animations in PowerPoint presentation KFC baked beans ‘ashamed of itself’ Put sock...

After an exiting battle over the last two weeks I can reveal that Chip has made it to the top once again, with A.M. and Nick in joint second place.  Special notice to Dom who scored twenty tickers this month, out of a total of 102, which must be a record.  Well done all, here's hoping we'll meet up again at the end of May, whenever in the month that occurs.  Links to the 91 FP, NiB and LA entries are, as usual, below. A.Mantra   Boy unable to comprehend dad’s glee at finding his old Scalextric Cauliflower ‘steak’ just cauliflower Drunk couples who ‘made friends’ at wedding now acting like they never met How to cope with not leaving the EU on 29th March Man calling in sick can’t decide between a stomach bug and a cold Man goes berserk when petrol pump dial lands on £20.01 Man in gastro-pub can’t work out which is the men’s toilet Man shakes man’s fist as greeting goes horribly wrong Man who went to ‘university of life,’ gr...