WOTM Nov 2021 mid month

 Blurb

Doctor Chutney has had a storming month so far, scoring in all categories.  He's starting to look unassailable and the real battle now is for second place.


BangingOnAgain 

Criminals propose 'just scrapping' criminal justice system

Chipchase 

As accusations of Johnson's utter incompetence grow it appears the PM's not for turning

Cluedo’s Rev Green released after 2016 conviction deemed to be 'unsafe'

Mystery businessman offers £1,000,000 prize for someone to kick Boris Johnson up the arse on live TV

Super-rich unhappy at being told they can no longer burn mountains of bank notes

Your new house share inmate not fitting in how you hoped she might

Chrisf 

5 Modern Pentathlon events for the 21st century

JobsForTheBoys.com - the number 1 platform for MPs looking for a second job

Doctor Chutney 

COP26: A Delegate's Guide

COP26 delegates shocked as Planet Earth says “I don’t need saving."

COP creators confirm number 27 in the franchise

GB News ‘devastated’ by the death of their only viewer

Kimjongunism: An ideology so new Gwyneth Paltrow hasn’t adopted it yet

Man converting shed to beach hut in readiness for rising sea levels

Premier League footballer openly admits “I’m overpaid"

Dominic_mcg 

Labour leader calls for resignation of 1980s amorous TV milkman

Woman in her 20s 'doesn't like Drag Race'

eppursimuove 

Hollywood greenlights new film - The Conte of Ouste Nuno

Frank Optional 

BlahBlahBlah26 angry at Greta Thunberg for claiming that COP26 attendees just go 'blah blah blah'

Boris Johnson publishes price list for describing what the UK is not

nicharper 

Guardian launches "What the BBC Says the Papers are Saying" column

NickB 

‘Invading Iraq was Lionel’s idea’ reveals younger brother Tony

oshaughnessy 

Australia solves rising sea level crisis by giving everyone a surfboard

Ebahgumshire Cricket Club banned from hosting Black History Month events

Geoffrey Cox traced to Caribbean tax haven after his voice registered 7.1 on the Richter scale

Rescuers attempt to save Westminster man trapped by his own lies

Sir Lupus 

Bezos commits to saving world once he owns it all

Govt replaces Standards Committee with Pay-As-You-Go system

Luton man loses house after accepting "Legitimate Interest" of fraudsters to steal it

StanleyMizaru 

Climate change beaten after Tory MP takes it on as second job

SteveB

Birds flying south for the winter have no intention of coming back to Britain

Conservatives mistakenly vote to 'review' the body which might find them guilty of their misdeeds

Fears grow for health of Gary Lineker as Walkers announce deadly crisps shortage

Great! Xmas' TV channel just stuffing the word Christmas into regular film titles

Steve Blair 

The NewsBiscuit guide to Rugby

stewartbarclay 

Big Bird admits role in vaccine conspiracy

Tories to form breakaway Super League of Lobbying

Throngsman 

Government introduce check-a-mate covid checks for travellers

Poorest 50% of planet 'likely to achieve COP26 targets'

Research shows all anti-vaxxers voted Brexit

'UK not a corrupt country', says man in charge of corrupt MPs

underconstruction 

Levelling up will ensure entire nation is underwater

Wrenfoe 

Johnson impregnates medical staff using elbow

MPs fail to declare MP’s salary – ‘as they haven’t earnt it’

Politicians complain that mobs are starting to look unruly

Wrap up warm to avoid having to diet

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