WOTM Feb 2019 final
Wren has fought a long battle with nickb this month, pipping nick by a whisker. However Wren rule states that nobody can win WOTM two months on the bounce so this month's winner is nickb
A Mantra
Chris Grayling announces plan to make X-Trail himself
Hipster ‘street food’ truck just a burger van
Man to undergo hipster-replacement surgery
Man who accidentally said ‘bye mum’ to his female boss, moves to Djibouti
Parents unable to connect daughter Alexa to WiFi
acidcirus
All of your friends currently writing unfunny comments on Rate My Plate
Adrian Bamforth
Pregnant woman leaves extremist group
Al Opecia
Over-aged schoolboy ‘wants to return to Remain camp’
apepper
Andrew Neil’s hair to step down
Jacob Rees-Mogg “stockpiling urchins”
John Humphries suggests all EU countries leave the EU
Man reconciled to fact that however big a TV he gets, it will seem normal after three weeks
Outrage as DWP pass Chris Grayling fit for office
Philip gives up driving license – Queen admits “We’ll miss the Uber money”
Benvoleo
Do you speak Brexit?
UK Independence Day: a NewsBiscuit Guide
Chipchase
Amazon to launch Daily Mail reading service
Dyson and Martin’s Laugh-in
Joey Essex to pour oil on the troubled waters of Brexit
Mary Berry named as new Queen Mum
Smartphone war looming as Apple ‘iCallbox’ squares up to Samsung ‘flip phone’
Tory Brexit woes set to hit the small screen as big-budget sitcom spin-off
TV cooking shows targeted in tough new government crackdown
Chrisf
‘Max Spielmann Stories’ feature set to transform photo-sharing
Crayon
“Eating with hands is great progress from head in trough” say Trump’s keepers
MI6 issue Prince Philip with a licence to kill
Royal Family’s move back to Saxony “may be something to do with Brexit”
Deceangli
Boris ‘stockpiling women’ in case of no-deal Brexit
Dick Everyman
‘Ferret-legging has made me the man I am today’ claims Rees-Mogg
UK voted top honeymoon destination by ISIS brides and groomers
Dominic-mcg
Derek Hatton to join the Scouts
Gerontius
‘Would you like help with your benefit claims?’ ask Northeners
Milo Shame
Idris Elba admits to ‘wanting to cut up a Ginger’
MzWibble
Anna Soubry faces move to revoke citizenship
nickb
Bluetooth to replace online dating
Crystal Palace breakaway players still haven’t decided on new team name
Knife crime up but spoon crime falls
Official Brexit emergency number will be ‘9999’
Philip ‘wants to keep shotgun license’, says hostage
Queen plans emergency bowel evacuation in no deal emergency.
Revived Crackerjack to offer crack as prizes
So now it’s acceptable, if not advisable, to start a sentence with ‘So’: OED
‘Special Place in Hull’ planned for study of Brexit strategy success
Statue of Margaret Thatcher to be ‘pre-vandalised’
Sasa Stankovic
Child warns anti-vaccination parents not to believe everything they read online
Lonely woman in love with Zuckerberg for showing interest in her private data
Next year’s Oscars to include ‘Film that should’ve won Oscars but didn’t’ awards
Squudge & Sir Lupus
The IRA withdraws balaclavas after ‘blackface’ outcry
Suburbandad
‘Special place in hell’ to be modelled on European Parliament
Sydalg
Government seeks to attract time traveller tourists from the future
Throngsman
Chris Grayling awards satire website contract for £50 Million
Chris Grayling being ‘prepped for bigger things – like Brexit Secretary’
Jeremy Corbyn and Theresa May join The Independent Group
Matt Hancock pledges to phase semaphore out of NHS
Titus
Tusk To Block Free Movement Between Special Place & Other Parts Of Hell
Tonymc81
Class of 5 Year-olds join Government’s Brexit negotiation team
Theresa May tipped to join Aaron Ramsey in summer move to Juventus
Wrenfoe
Afghanistan 10, Rest of the World 0
Anti-racist party promises to protect those of a ‘funny tinge’
Ex-pat wants to use NHS after Brexit – just as soon as ISIS lets her go
‘If only we had a centrist pro-EU party’ says Vince Cable
It’s Chris Grayling – what did you expect?
Jussie Smollett may have lied about Brexit
Maybot fails Turing test
Owen Smith died four years ago, apparently
Pope: Keeping a nun as a sex slave is no longer cool
‘Trump’s a racist conman??’ says no-one
Trust no one who cannot understand the ‘reply all’ function
YaBasta
First Brexit-era Bond film to be called ‘ShatWhereWeEat’
Guardian stockpiling hysteria in preparation for Brexit
Olivia Colman to appear in literally everything
Riverdance is only acceptable form of border, say Irish
Where are they now? The Independent Group
A Mantra
Chris Grayling announces plan to make X-Trail himself
Hipster ‘street food’ truck just a burger van
Man to undergo hipster-replacement surgery
Man who accidentally said ‘bye mum’ to his female boss, moves to Djibouti
Parents unable to connect daughter Alexa to WiFi
acidcirus
All of your friends currently writing unfunny comments on Rate My Plate
Adrian Bamforth
Pregnant woman leaves extremist group
Al Opecia
Over-aged schoolboy ‘wants to return to Remain camp’
apepper
Andrew Neil’s hair to step down
Jacob Rees-Mogg “stockpiling urchins”
John Humphries suggests all EU countries leave the EU
Man reconciled to fact that however big a TV he gets, it will seem normal after three weeks
Outrage as DWP pass Chris Grayling fit for office
Philip gives up driving license – Queen admits “We’ll miss the Uber money”
Benvoleo
Do you speak Brexit?
UK Independence Day: a NewsBiscuit Guide
Chipchase
Amazon to launch Daily Mail reading service
Dyson and Martin’s Laugh-in
Joey Essex to pour oil on the troubled waters of Brexit
Mary Berry named as new Queen Mum
Smartphone war looming as Apple ‘iCallbox’ squares up to Samsung ‘flip phone’
Tory Brexit woes set to hit the small screen as big-budget sitcom spin-off
TV cooking shows targeted in tough new government crackdown
Chrisf
‘Max Spielmann Stories’ feature set to transform photo-sharing
Crayon
“Eating with hands is great progress from head in trough” say Trump’s keepers
MI6 issue Prince Philip with a licence to kill
Royal Family’s move back to Saxony “may be something to do with Brexit”
Deceangli
Boris ‘stockpiling women’ in case of no-deal Brexit
Dick Everyman
‘Ferret-legging has made me the man I am today’ claims Rees-Mogg
UK voted top honeymoon destination by ISIS brides and groomers
Dominic-mcg
Derek Hatton to join the Scouts
Gerontius
‘Would you like help with your benefit claims?’ ask Northeners
Milo Shame
Idris Elba admits to ‘wanting to cut up a Ginger’
MzWibble
Anna Soubry faces move to revoke citizenship
nickb
Bluetooth to replace online dating
Crystal Palace breakaway players still haven’t decided on new team name
Knife crime up but spoon crime falls
Official Brexit emergency number will be ‘9999’
Philip ‘wants to keep shotgun license’, says hostage
Queen plans emergency bowel evacuation in no deal emergency.
Revived Crackerjack to offer crack as prizes
So now it’s acceptable, if not advisable, to start a sentence with ‘So’: OED
‘Special Place in Hull’ planned for study of Brexit strategy success
Statue of Margaret Thatcher to be ‘pre-vandalised’
Sasa Stankovic
Child warns anti-vaccination parents not to believe everything they read online
Lonely woman in love with Zuckerberg for showing interest in her private data
Next year’s Oscars to include ‘Film that should’ve won Oscars but didn’t’ awards
Squudge & Sir Lupus
The IRA withdraws balaclavas after ‘blackface’ outcry
Suburbandad
‘Special place in hell’ to be modelled on European Parliament
Sydalg
Government seeks to attract time traveller tourists from the future
Throngsman
Chris Grayling awards satire website contract for £50 Million
Chris Grayling being ‘prepped for bigger things – like Brexit Secretary’
Jeremy Corbyn and Theresa May join The Independent Group
Matt Hancock pledges to phase semaphore out of NHS
Titus
Tusk To Block Free Movement Between Special Place & Other Parts Of Hell
Tonymc81
Class of 5 Year-olds join Government’s Brexit negotiation team
Theresa May tipped to join Aaron Ramsey in summer move to Juventus
Wrenfoe
Afghanistan 10, Rest of the World 0
Anti-racist party promises to protect those of a ‘funny tinge’
Ex-pat wants to use NHS after Brexit – just as soon as ISIS lets her go
‘If only we had a centrist pro-EU party’ says Vince Cable
It’s Chris Grayling – what did you expect?
Jussie Smollett may have lied about Brexit
Maybot fails Turing test
Owen Smith died four years ago, apparently
Pope: Keeping a nun as a sex slave is no longer cool
‘Trump’s a racist conman??’ says no-one
Trust no one who cannot understand the ‘reply all’ function
YaBasta
First Brexit-era Bond film to be called ‘ShatWhereWeEat’
Guardian stockpiling hysteria in preparation for Brexit
Olivia Colman to appear in literally everything
Riverdance is only acceptable form of border, say Irish
Where are they now? The Independent Group
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